It’s been a while. I had gotten out of the habit of writing and even looking at my site for a good few months. Mostly because I’ve been trying to navigate through life and the placement of things. I’ve really been challenging myself to live differently than I had in my past. In a lot of ways, I made progress and created habits that serve my greater purposes. In others, I didn’t really make much progress. In fact, it felt like I would take 5 steps forward and 7 back. Like my old self would come back and feel as though it had the best solution to a problem it never successfully solved. I’ve wanted to quit so many times in the last 7 months. There’s challenge after challenge, and it seems like they’re never going to stop rearing their ugly heads. It’s so much harder than it looks to. I wrote a brief piece about social media, and the effects it has on society. I think it’s so much easier to post happy and positive parts of your life, but then people tend to not get the full picture and run with what they see. On the outside, it probably looks like I’ve been happily galavanting through New York City, and popping up in random American cities. While that’s partially true, it’s more like I’ve been sledging through NYC trying to keep my head afloat and quite honestly, I’m barely there. If it weren’t for my mom, I’d probably be drowning in despair and debt.
Having the relationship with my stepmom that I have has changed the game for me entirely. She’s gracious enough to let me live at home again, while I figure out my next steps and build an empire. I think between having my own set of goals and an incredible support system of family and loved ones, I’ve been able to avoid falling into depression. I’ve still been a little manic as far as spending habits and sex life goes, but in comparison to my past, I’m still ahead of the game. In the last week or so, I’ve recognized the need for me to seriously isolate myself. A step further than what I did last year when I decided to relocate. Isolation to me is a chance for rebirth. The solitude is not a punishment by any means. It’s a blessing. To be able to walk and talk with yourself, and not be distracted by outside forces is beyond lucky. So, while I can, I’m taking advantage of it. Something I’m grateful for is that my close friends understand this concept and respect it. I go through periods where I’m super accessible to those that I love. Where I’m constantly on the phone, on the internet, and around for people to have access to. In my past I had friends that abused that part of my personality and when it was time for me to retreat and isolate myself, they were upset. In fact, they felt offended that I would want to take time away. Generally speaking, anyone that doesn’t understand your boundaries is not a good friend or person in your life. Do yourself a favor and get rid of them. Shed your skin and your circle as you retreat into isolation.
There’s an innate beauty in protecting your peace and soul. The ways at which you love, protect, and nurture your soul is crucial to your existence. Your life reflects how well you do those things. I first made that correlation when I tuned into how much noise I had in my life and how I responded to it. The less energy I put into noise and distractions, the more fruitful my life got. When I isolated myself and focused fully on MY life, health, wealth, and work, things were quite peaceful. I didn’t appreciate the peace I had though and growing up in a family that’s always made a lot of noise it’s seemingly uncomfortable if it’s too quiet. The feeling that trauma has to consistently be happening in your life for it be normal is one many can relate to. It’s a terrible sentiment but it’s not that complicated. Anything that’s done in repetition becomes a habit, and that then becomes your lifestyle. Breaking that lifestyle habit and cycle is not an easy task either. So, in my young age I had no idea that the quiet parts should have been preserved. Life is meant to be enjoyed. It’s a lot easier to enjoy yourself when you’re not navigating chaos. Find ways to bring yourself peace and quiet. There will be chaos anyway. The key is to learn to avoid going through it and instead navigate the calmer waters around it. We don’t always have to be living through chaos and madness to make progress.
Progress comes when you preserve your peace and find new ways to improve your circumstances. There’s a lot of hard work that gets done when you take the time to find and preserve your peace. We don’t always take the time to give ourselves what we need. Sometimes out of fear, other times out of feeling as though you literally can’t. Thinking that you can’t do something because you don’t know how. I’ll share my favorite 7 things you can do. I try my best to practice these 7 as often as possible.
7 Things you can do to help find your peace:
Write/Release feelings you’ve been carrying with you
Make responsible decisions
Be accountable at all times
Be honest (a. About your feelings (b. With yourself (c. With others))).
Exercise (whatever that looks like for you. It can be a class, getting a trainer, walking, running, just something to get your body moving and adrenaline pumping).